Big Pants (source: Vogue Runway)

One of the greatest things about growing older is that you get to a point where you understand that your life won’t be any worse if you stop embracing fashion trends. I’m well past that point.

The reason I have that subject on my mind is that I’ve been seeing the big pants trend everywhere, and not just on “Street Style” section of vogue.com. Kids are wearing huge pants. They’re also wearing huge tops and huge shoes. It’s a revolt against the past several years of yoga pants, skinny jeans and mostly-fitted silhouettes. The pendulum has simply swung in the other direction. Even the least-fashionable people amongst us could have seen it coming from a million miles away.

Nevertheless, it’s not a trend I will be embracing. First of all, I’m a fitness trainer and I have been a fitness trainer since the eighties. I didn’t do all this work to hide behind my clothes. Second, I’m a Capricorn with a Cancer moon and Libra rising. You wouldn’t catch me dead in something as sloppy as the pants on the guy in the photo I posted above. I had some pants like that in the late eighties. In fact, that might be them. It looks as if he found them under a pile of crap that has been sitting in the back of an abandoned Goodwill store where they ended up after I donated them to the charity three-and-a-half decades ago.

I’m kidding, of course! I’m very open-minded when it comes to fashion. But I’m also pretty sure that no one really gives a shit about what I wear. I’m also sure that I don’t give a shit about what they wear. If this article about “elephant pants” didn’t appear on the front page of “Vogue Runway,” I wouldn’t have gone looking for it. Just like skinny jeans, “street style” is a concept that could use a rest. Nothing reeks of desperation like someone feigning disinterest in fashion by adopting a counter-culture style in order to get photographed by the most influential fashion magazine in the world. I’ve written plenty about “contrived nonchalance” and how I believe it is the stupidest, most-immature fad in the history of fashion, and yet it is the most-pervasive trend the world has ever known.

With all the planetary action in the sign of Aquarius over the past several months, I also saw the return to this odious style coming from a million miles away: people bucking the trends in order to appear controversial without understanding that becoming a true original only happens when you step away from fashion entirely. Wearing a pair of gigantic, sloppy pants and an oversized hoodie doesn’t make you stand out in a crowd when every high school kid in every civilized country in the world is also embracing the trend. This is simply a Grunge redux: the return of the early 90s where pretending to not care about fashion was the fashion.

Thankfully, Jupiter has already moved into Pisces where weirdness prevails. Fashion’s genuine oddballs will start setting the trends again by reminding us that there are no rules when it comes to cultivating personal style, and that includes people like me who dress for themselves and not for the street-style photographers.

In 2022, having style means that you have nothing to prove to anyone but yourself.

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