Hedi Slimane for Celine (source: Vogue)

Hedi Slimane showed his menswear collection for Celine yesterday.

I’ve been kind to the designer recently. Once I figured him out astrologically, I began to appreciate what he does —  hence, the nice things I had to say about him in “Star Struck Style.” Nevertheless, I don’t get that excited about the clothes that he creates because they are terribly expensive and rarely distinctive enough to make me want to pay for them. Take the velour track jacket in the photo above. I could get a Todd Snyder for Champion jacket that was made in Canada for a fraction of the price and I would achieve the same look without appearing as if I only cared about the label I was wearing.

For that reason, I really can’t say that yesterday’s Celine show was a success. Slimane will once again be praised as he always is praised, but the hype he generates from this show will only resonate with those skinny guys who believe that having thighs the circumference of my forearms is a desirable physical trait. I’m not trying to body shame anyone, but I am saying that Slimane designs for a type and that type isn’t me — or anyone who hangs out in a gym for that matter, or anyone who has consumed carbohydrates in the past decade, or anyone who believes that caffeine and cigarettes should not be included on the food pyramid . . .

I had a look at his natal chart just to see if there was anything there that would make me understand why the designer is so obsessed with this skinny silhouette. The two of us actually have several things in common, including our shared rising sign and midheaven. We’re fairly close in age, so we also have Uranus, Neptune and Pluto in the same signs. The major difference in our charts is where his Cancer planets reside. He has the sun, Venus and Mars in the tenth house. There is a relationship in this chart between art, commerce and sexual energy with the notion of nostalgia itself. I understand it, but it’s just not the way that I look at fashion. I also have Venus and Mars sharing a sign, but mine reside in the fourth house. With my Capricorn sun, I view nostalgia as a way to poke fun at the notion of style itself, not as a valid business strategy that can sustain the fortunes of one of the most prestigious brands in fashion. That’s probably why it took me a long time to admit that Hedi Slimane has a unique talent that practically no one else in the business of fashion has been able to cultivate so successfully. Obviously, it works for him.

Still, none of that explains his obsession with skinny boys. I could go back to his Libra rising because I associate Libra with long, lean lines, but I have the same rising sign and I want to take the model in the photo above to Dairy Queen to fatten him up. I find his thigh gap alarming, and if I was styling a runway show I wouldn’t have put him in those pants. In fact, I probably wouldn’t have cast him at all.

So, I’m left wondering what it is in Hedi Slimane’s natal chart that makes him obsessed with this silhouette (and the models that fit into it), and why he hasn’t wavered from this look in decades. If anyone has a theory about why he is the way he is, I’d love to hear it. Let me know via the comments section or on any of my social media sites.

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