Jan Crouch.jpg
Jan Crouch (source: Dlisted)

I’m still reeling over yesterday’s Gucci show at Westminster Abbey and how press darling Alessandro Michele has managed to make his everything-but-the-kitchen-sink style into a marketing sensation. Everything about Gucci right now makes me want to avoid Gucci.

In my book, “Cosmically Chic,” I portray Pisces as the anything-goes sign. Pisces style is about piling on things that don’t match until you look crazy enough to stop people from questioning what you’re wearing because they’re afraid that you’ll pull a knife out of your Gucci Dionysus bag. I used a particularly English word, “daft,” to describe it in my book. My American editor obviously didn’t know what it meant because she incorrectly corrected it to read “deft.” Ha!

The daft look (otherwise known as “English insane-asylum chic”) is okay with me. I wouldn’t dress like that, but I’m not a Pisces native. I’m a Capricorn, and we goats take a more discerning approach to style. I adored Gucci when Tom Ford was at Gucci. Now I love Tom Ford. If I’m going to wear a status brand, it better not look as if I bought it in a thrift store.

Anyway, I do believe that I get Gucci right now. I just don’t like it as much as everyone else. It reminds me of Dolce & Gabbana (a label I traditionally associate with Pisces), where the vast majority of the line seems ridiculous to me. Sure, I can appreciate the craftsmanship, etc., but it’s easy to grow weary of the brand’s house signatures when all ten-thousand of them share the runway at the same time.

On a barely-related note, Jan Crouch died earlier this week. I didn’t know who she was until her obituary became news, accompanied by the photo above. She was a famous televangelist’s wife, just like Tammy Faye Baker. Of course, the first thing I did when I saw the photo was a Google search for her birthday. Just like that beacon of Pisces glamour, Tammy Faye, Jan Crouch was also a Pisces. See . . . astrology really does work!

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