Donald Trump (source: Salon)

It will come as no surprise to anyone who knows me that I believe Donald Trump is evil. In fact, I’ve called him “Satan” countless times in real life. But is he really Satan?

Well, I don’t know about that. I’m not really an avid reader of the Bible, so I’m not going to pretend to be an expert in something that I’ve never studied (because that would make me look as stupid as Donald Trump does every time he opens his mouth to profess his own expertise in anything).

I am, however, a guy who has studied astrology for decades. For that reason, I’ve had the first week of July on my radar for quite some time. Not only does Saturn slip back into Capricorn during that week, but Jupiter also backs up into Pluto during its retrograde cycle in the same sign. Both of these events are a big deal!

Compare what just happened in your own world over the last few days when Saturn moved into Aquarius to what happens when the ringed planet moves back into Capricorn in early July. Also, take note of what happens around April 5 when Jupiter and Pluto first meet up because that conjunction recurs at the same time that Saturn switches signs.

On the bright side, the first week of July corresponds with the forty-second month of Donald Trump’s presidency. There’s a prophecy in the Bible that claims the Antichrist will have 1,260 days (or forty-two months) on earth. The Jupiter/Pluto conjunction occurs on the degree right between his natal Venus/Saturn conjunction right around day 1,260, so there’s that, too.

I don’t know exactly what will happen to Donald Trump during the first week of July, but I’m going to thank my lucky stars if it’s something awful that means I’ll never have to look at his ugly face again. I’ve never hated anyone more than I hate Donald Trump. Even if he isn’t Satan incarnate, he is the embodiment of evil. Watching him get what’s coming to him will be the most glorious day of my life.

If something does really happen to him in the forty-second month of his presidency that corresponds to these astrological events, it will make me into an even bigger believer. It might even make me consider picking up a Bible to see what else it has to say. I’ll probably skip right to Revelations, though. I don’t know if I have the attention span to get through the entire thing.

On second thought, maybe there’s a movie version . . .

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