Star Struck Style

December 25 is Justin Trudeau’s birthday.

Now I suppose that this may come as a shock to many of my non-Canadian friends, but I don’t like Justin Trudeau. There are many reasons, many of which I am about to disclose.

I’m a political moderate, which means that I should be a big supporter of the Liberal Party of Canada. Yet I’m also an Albertan, and my home province has a long history of hostile relationships with people named “Trudeau.” They’ve demonized the industry of Alberta for decades while using our money to gain political advantage in eastern Canada. Frankly, they’re hypocritical assholes.

I also possess an aversion to the privileged children of famous people. Yet even though I expect a lot from them, they can win me over. Stella McCartney is an example of someone who eventually impressed me with her talent and made me forget where she came from. Justin Trudeau still hasn’t impressed me. He seems like a mere spokesman for his party. Jean Chrétien, the last Liberal Prime Minister who was also a Capricorn, made me believe that he was calling the shots.

But what I really hate about Justin Trudeau is the carefully-contrived, über-compassionate persona he has adopted to get where he is. If there’s one thing I don’t get from most of my Capricorn brothers and sisters it’s a sense that they’re trying to hide their feelings behind a false front. Just the other day I posted a photo of Marlene Dietrich wearing a look of thinly-veiled condescension that could cut through glass. That’s one thing that I believe we Capricorns have in common. We can try to be as glib as the rest of you, but because we know that it comes off as insincere, we eventually just learn to deal with the consequences of our inability to put up a false front.

I get nothing but a “false front” from Justin Trudeau, so I looked at his natal chart to see if there was something there that would explain why he seems so smug to me. He does have a fifth house sun, which would make him into a good performer. He also has Saturn in Gemini nearly conjunct his midheaven from the tenth house. It’s a strong position for a planetary placement that could normally tongue-tie an individual. In this case, it denotes a silver-tongued orator: the CEO who always says what his shareholders want to hear.

To me, he has the chart of an actor. That doesn’t surprise me because I believe that he is an actor. Despite our similarities (the sun in Capricorn; Mercury in Sagittarius; Venus in Aquarius), I don’t feel like Trudeau is playing for the same team as me and the rest of my fellow Capricorns. Can we kick him out of the club?