Kaycee Clark (source: CBS)

December 26 is Kaycee Clark’s birthday.

Why didn’t I know that Kaycee Clark is a Capricorn? When I picked her to win “Big Brother 20” after reading the cast bios on the CBS website, I probably didn’t look up any birthdays for the contestants because they usually don’t show up on sites like “Fandom” until well into the season. Also, I was probably still traumatized from discovering that Josh Martinez is also a Capricorn. The only good thing about the Season 19 winner was that he beat Paul Abrahamian and Christmas Abbott. All three of them were assholes, but both Paul and Christmas possessed the emotional maturity to understand that their actions were unforgivable. Josh, on the other hand . . .

But I digress! I thought Kaycee was a terrific player. She beat Tyler Crispen at his own game by aligning with him, but also by allowing him to make a million promises that he couldn’t keep. It was a terrific strategy that kept her in a position of power for the entire season.

Anyway, I’m thrilled to know that Kaycee is in my club. I still want to count myself amongst the Capricorn winners of “Big Brother,” even though I didn’t audition for the upcoming season of the Canadian version of the show. I had a feeling that everything in my life was about to be fucked up again by the pandemic, and I was right. So, next season it is! Maybe by then the producers of the show will be publicly shamed into casting someone over the age of forty who doesn’t already have one foot in the grave. I can dream, can’t I?

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