Kelly & Bethenny (source: Bravo)

May 1 is Kelly Bensimon’s birthday.

The first installment of any of the “Real Housewives” show I watched was during the second season of “The Real Housewives of New York City.” It was the infamous episode where Kelly Bensimon told Bethenny Frankel where she stood in the hierarchy of NYC “housewives.” I knew who Bethenny was because I had seen her on the Martha Stewart version of “The Apprentice,” and I knew Kelly Bensimon’s name because I watched her husband on “America’s Next Top Model.” Still, I didn’t really know anything else about the women or the show itself. Let me just say, that episode was illuminating.

Once I had seen the light, the “Housewives” shows became one of my guilty pleasures. For the last year or so, I’ve been paying attention to the zodiac signs of many of the cast members because I see that many of their relationships have been written in the stars. Kelly and Bethenny are no exception.

Bensimon has the sun, Mercury and Mars in Taurus. Frankel has the sun, Mercury, Venus, Jupiter and Neptune in Scorpio. What’s more, their suns are opposite within half a degree, and Frankel’s Saturn in Taurus is conjunct Bensimon’s Mercury within a degree.

These two women were meant to fight. To say that they were not cut from the same cloth is the understatement of the century; Bensimon is burlap and Frankel is snakeskin. If you could bring the two together to make a dress, odds are it would be ugly — experimental-runway, Prada ugly.

I love how these shows demonstrate astrology in action. Every one of them operates as if an astrologer sat in on the casting call when the cast was first assembled. Just the other night, Giselle from “The Real Housewives of Potomac” made a crack about Robyn’s “linebacker shoulders” and I laughed out loud because it was exactly the dynamic I expected from a Virgo/Aries pairing.

I’d love to continue having these discussions in the future. I know that there are a lot of “Real Housewives” podcasts and web shows. If anyone out there stumbles across my various posts on the topic and wants to have me as a guest on their show, it would be my pleasure. My contact information is listed at the top of the page.

Let’s talk.

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