Star Struck Style

Every time I sit down to write this list of who has bugged me the most during the current year, I go back to the list I wrote the previous year to see if my opinions have changed much over the last several months. There weren’t a lot of surprises this year, but there were enough to make me wonder what next year’s awards are going to look like.

The reason I’m curious to know how different things might be is that Pluto is just a couple of days away from making its permanent move into Aquarius. This is a generational shift: the sort of thing that will change everyone’s perception about what is going on in the world. The legendary astrologer Sydney Omarr used to publish horoscope paperbacks every year that included a list of zodiac key phrases. For Capricorn, that phrase is “I use.” Well, the users have certainly had their way with the world over the past twenty years while Pluto transited Capricorn. Fortunately, the key phrase for Aquarius is “I know.” With Pluto in Aquarius until 2043, people are finally going to wake the fuck up to what’s happening and stop handing all their power over to those users.

In the meantime, we all have a lot of work to do, and that includes recognizing who the biggest assholes are among us. Of course, that brings me to my list. From worst to first, here are the 2024 Zodiac Sign of the Year Awards. Part recap, part prediction, these words are meant to be enjoyed in the spirit in which they were intended: I want to slap some sense into those of you who have been pissing me off.

#12: Capricorn — This is tough for me because Capricorn is my sun sign, and there are plenty of terrific Capricorns in my club. However, the worst of the worst Capricorns have been making the headlines for all the wrong reasons in 2024. Bottom-of-the-barrel Capricorns who epitomize the cliches that define the sign have been using the rest of us for the past two decades. What’s worse, though, is that we have let them use us. We all need to take a step back in this new era to understand what happens when we give it all away to these greedy monsters just because they make our lives marginally more convenient.

#11: Aquarius — With Pluto briefly visiting Aquarius earlier in the year, we got a taste of what’s to come in this new era. That includes regular encounters with emboldened Aquarius natives who fixate on power and remain intractable in situations where anyone else would attempt to facilitate a compromise. What’s more, Jupiter and Saturn’s positions in their charts have made them even less flexible than usual.

#10: Gemini — I predicted that Karma would eventually catch up to a lot of you Gemini natives while Pluto moved through your solar eighth house. Now I’m going to predict that those of you who got away with murder over the last several years are going to collapse under the weight of your own hubris, both figuratively and literally. Having Pluto in your solar ninth house is going to teach you some hard lessons about squandering opportunities and taking everything good that has ever happened to you for granted.

#9: Leo — Overconfidence is both your superpower and your Achilles heel, Leo. In 2024, we all got to see your overconfidence take you far. In 2025, we all will get to see your overconfidence take you into places you don’t want to go, like courtrooms or prison cells. You have angered a lot of people who want nothing more than to target your vulnerabilities and cut your ego down to size.

#8: Cancer — With Pluto briefly moving into your solar eighth house in 2024, you got a taste of what it was like to rob the Karmic vault. Just remember that what goes around comes around. You can be the best thing that happened to the world over the next twenty years, or the worst thing. Choose your path wisely.

#7: Virgo — You’ve been very sure of yourself for quite some time. The problem is that those around you have lost confidence in your ability to listen to alternative viewpoints and valid criticism. On the bright side, Pluto’s ingress into your solar sixth house should make you more Virgo-like than ever before. Leaving your ego at the door will be much easier for you in the future. As a result, your star is rising. You’ll be back at the top of this list in no time.

#6: Taurus — Blending into the background has been a valid strategy for many of you Taurus individuals for a while now. That has put you somewhere in the middle of this list for the past couple of years. However, you might be feeling the urge to break free in the not-too-distant future. I’m not sure if that will result in a move up the rankings, or a move down. Whatever the case, try to be noticed for the right things in 2025, like doing good in the world. My fear is that you might make headlines for all the wrong reasons.

#5: Scorpio — Every year there is one entry on this list that makes me say “Hey, where have you been?” This year, that honor goes to you. There’s nothing wrong with retreating into the shadows every now and then. For you Scorpions, it’s in your nature.

#4: Pisces — With Saturn in your sign, you may be feeling repressed lately. What you might not realize is that everyone else is happy that you have your feet on the ground for once because they get tired of asking you to pull your head out of the clouds. Pluto’s ingress into your solar twelfth house could make it easier for you to pretend that your are a card-carrying member of the real world. The future looks bright for you, Pisces!

#3: Aries — For the most part, you’ve learned to keep your thoughts to yourself over the past few years. It makes you far more likable when you aren’t barking like a dog twenty-four hours a day. Saturn is going to move into your sign soon, so this trend should continue. You might not like it when you can’t get the right words out, but the rest of us are happy when you are partially muzzled.

#2: Libra — The stars have aligned to make the most of your more-desirable qualities: patience, equanimity and respect for justice. The best of you have been living up to your own standards and providing the rest of us with the role models we need at this point in time. Keep up the good work.

#1: Sagittarius — Your big-picture thinking is what the world needs right now. We can’t get along unless we attempt to get along, and no one knows that more than you. Thanks for trying, Sagittarius.